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Home / Tales of a Serial Dater: One Thing’s Missing | HuffPost Chicago

Tales of a Serial Dater: One Thing’s Missing | HuffPost Chicago

Yesterday I found myself standing up in line at Starbucks and receiving my necessary Monday day caffeinated drinks fix, whenever a very good-looking guy, with so many buck look, helped myself choose my personal bank card. I’d fallen it while buying a tall skinny vanilla latte. He had been breathtaking. The moment their vision found mine, I imagined my knees had been planning to buckle and I also would definitely fall smack-dab into the muffin countertop. I thanked him and moved out-of-line to wait for my personal morning addiction to get ready. While I was waiting, the guy stepped over and introduced themselves. Whenever Mr. Million Dollar Smile hits out their hand introducing himself, I notice a beautiful set of cuff-links, my personal male fashion weakness, and an extremely macho group of arms that provided a substantial handshake. I will be instantaneously putty when it comes to those manly hands. Whenever my coffee order was actually known as, he hit over and grabbed it, took down a pen, and blogged their quantity unofficially of my personal glass. Adorable, I know. He flashed me personally their hot grin one final time, and without saying a word, handed me my personal coffee-and walked away.

We wait the essential 3 days to phone him (yeah, that is right fellas, i could have fun with the online game too). Mr. Million Dollar Smile and that I have actually a good discussion whereby he recommended we go see resident deal during the residence of organization. I am above excited. We came across at Southern Water vegan enchiladas thug kitchen to seize a quick bite to consume ahead of the show and a container of wine. Once our very own food emerged, I was a tad little bit tipsy and already incredibly in love. I am in the exact middle of a hysterical story (this would not surprising to anybody) when I appeared around see him just take a bite out-of their hamburger plus it, you will find their white teeth – those remarkable teeth that provided him that million buck look – stuck…in their hamburger.

I attempted not to try to let my surprise and scary show, but anyone who understands me personally knows that my thoughts are created all-around my face. The guy switched eight colors of red and made an effort to clarify how they had gotten knocked-out in a fight. Exactly What? My Prince Charming is a thug in cuff-links? Obviously, at one point in his life he had been teaching for an Ultimate battling Championship along with one seven leading teeth knocked out during a fight and then wears false teeth that actually video into their throat. Hmmm. Today, I am not sure about you, but nothing states beautiful in my opinion like a man who is just 32 features fake teeth. I instantly have visions of him investing the night time and running to see their teeth resting in a cup of Efferdent Plus on my nightstand. We silently scolded my self for being very really shallow and swore to block the vision of him toothless of my head, and enjoy the remainder of the night with a sensible, funny and intelligent man.

We drop by the House of organization, grabbed some beers during the club, and pushed our very own way up concise where I became front and center with Citizen Cope. Yum. We’re having an incredible time, Citizen deal had been performing Sideways, and Mr. Million Dollar Smile leaned over, got my personal hand, and pulled me in for a soap opera worthy kiss. We right away had visions of our breathtaking young ones, all of our cottage design residence in Naperville and what autos we might drive since I have will not buy a mini-van, until i will be snapped into real life with the recognition that there was actually some thing during my throat… and it’s really perhaps not my gum. I nearly vomited all over the floor, there before Clarence Greenwood (the lead singer of Citizen deal and a big chick) once I noticed that what was inside my mouth were their teeth. We shit you not. The second couple of minutes occurred in slow motion. He looked up at myself, smiled this toothless grin, and started initially to state some thing about me having his teeth, and I also reflexively freaked out and wanted those teeth out of my damn mouth area as quickly as possible, thus I spit them out so fast you’ll have believed these people were poison. Bad step, Gena. Next 20 minutes or so were invested wanting to browse a floor of this dark colored space with only our very own cellular phones as lightweight and attempting not to ever interrupt the other concertgoers. When we eventually found them, they were covered in dirt, dust and a few serious bar grime. I found myself carefully disgusted, however as disgusted as I had been when he…wait because of it…then put them back into their lips – bar grime and all sorts of!

Yup, that’s it. I’m away. Temporary clip in teeth I am able to handle (with booze), but i must draw the line at terrible hygiene. Really does the guy hug his mama with this mouth? Ew. Ew. Ew.

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